Monday, March 12, 2007

Howdy. Well, the clippers lost in Oakland on Friday, in the much hyped & ballyhooed (by others too, not just me) intra cali matchup, brimming with huge ramifications in the swill infested middle of the barrel western conference race for the 8 spot and the opportunity for quick infamy via decimation (division into 10 even pieces of squalouros dilapidation) by Dallas in the first round.

From what I’ve read, the Warriors look pretty good right now, they got all their pieces back, Baron Davis healthy, Jason Richardson healthy, Andris Biedrens and Montay Ellis used to playing heavy minutes all year and contributing, the new additions of Al Harrington and Stephen “strip club shooter” Jackson gelling like Magellan. Shit, I’d trade squads with the dubs in a heartbeat. Well, nah, cancel that. Let’s run with these clippers. I’ve got too much emotional attachment to Elton, and hey, even Corey, at this point. Plus Sam I am and Shaun in the injury ward, oh yeah, his surgery’s today. Yup. These are my clippers. My little keg-clippers.

That’s a reference to that HORRIBLE Heineken Keg Can commercial that never ceases playing on ESPN radio. Has anyone out there besides me heard it and wanted to pull over next to the nearest bridge & jump off? I’ll leave it at that. And no I wouldn’t just drive my car off the bridge, cuz then what would my wife drive? See, how selfless I am.

So yeah, the clippers, after losing not so valiantly in oaktown, went back home and continued the lack of valor against Detroit at Staples center. And now they get to go on the road for the Texas swing! Great. Great sandwich. That’s such a great sandwich that Eddie Van Halen would probably drink it down after showing up drunk on David Lee Roth’s doorstep crying for forgiveness for stealing his hairpiece that night in Ruston Louisiana. Hey, if you don’t know, I’m not going to tell you.

The funny (hilarious) thing is that the clippers are STILL holding on to that 8 spot. Effin thing is like a hot potato, but these LA boys don’t know how to play. Or maybe they do. They just hold on to it in sufferance. Suffrage? Anyway. The losing continues unabated, and their they sit, because the losing continues unabated all over these realms, when your competition is Sacramento (actually playing better, gaining), Golden State (looking scary, but still not quite ready for primetime), NOOCH (just an enigma, can’t figure them out) and Minnie (a complete mess), plus denver, home of the odd couple minus the happy funtime spaghetti hijinx. Let me know if I’m missing any pertinent information, if you exist. Gratzi. And uh, go clips, lets lose less than the other excrement piles. Now that’s a mantra, or not.

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